Yes, believe it or not, these are all genuine quotes from the man the people elected as the 43rd US President:

Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream.

I admit it, I am not one of the great linguists.

For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it.

I am a person who recognizes the fallacy of humans.

I have opinions of my own, strong opinions, but I don't always agree with them.

I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.

I know how hard it is to put food on your family.

I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe - I believe what I believe is right.

I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn't here.

I recently met with the finance minister of the Palestinian Authority, was very impressed by his grasp of finances.

I think anybody who doesn't think I'm smart enough to handle the job is underestimating.

I think war is a dangerous place.

I understand small business growth. I was one.

I wish I wasn't the war president. Who in the heck wants to be a war president? I don't.

I'm not a very good novelist. But it'd make a pretty interesting novel.

If the terriers and bariffs are torn down, this economy will grow.

If this were a dictatorship, it would be a heck of a lot easier - so long as I'm the dictator.

I'm also not very analytical. You know I don't spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things.

I'm the master of low expectations.

I'm the commander - see, I don't need to explain - I do not need to explain why I say things. That's the interesting thing about being President.

It would be a mistake for the United States Senate to allow any kind of human cloning to come out of that chamber.

Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?

Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people and neither do we.

The problem with the French is that they don't have a word for entrepreneur.

There's an old saying in Tennessee, I know it's in Texas, probably Tennessee, that says 'Fool me once [pause], shame on…shame on you. [Long pause] Fool me. [Pause] You can't get fooled again.'

They have miscalculated me as a leader.

They misunderestimated me.

This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating.

We cannot let terrorists and rogue nations hold this nation hostile or hold our allies hostile.

We need an energy bill that encourages consumption.

We ought to make the pie higher.

We're concerned about AIDS inside our White House - make no mistake about it.

Will the highways on the Internet become more few?

Do you have blacks, too? (To Brazilian President Fernando Cardoso)

When I was young and irresponsible, I was young and irresponsible.

You're free. And freedom is beautiful. And, you know, it'll take time to restore chaos and order - order out of chaos. But we will.

This is still a dangerous world. It's a world of madmen and uncertainty and potential mential losses.

I think there is a Trojan horse lurking in the weeds trying to pull a fast one on the American people.

This is a world that is much more uncertain than the past. In the past we were certain, we were certain it was us versus the Russians in the past. We were certain, and therefore we had huge nuclear arsenals aimed at each other to keep the peace. That's what we were certain of…You see, even though it's an uncertain world, we're certain of some things.

It is clear our nation is reliant upon big foreign oil. More and more of our imports come from overseas.

I think we agree, the past is over.

And there's no doubt in my mind, not one doubt in my mind, that we will fail.

The important question is, how many hands have I shaked.

General…I can't name the general.(When asked to name President of Pakistan)

We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease.

The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein, and his willingness to terrorize himself.

When I was a kid I remember that they used to put out there in the Old West a wanted poster. It said, Wanted: Dead or Alive.

My answer is to bring them on. (On Iraqi militants attacking US forces)

Major combat operations in Iraq have ended. In the battle of Iraq, the United States and our allies have prevailed. -- May 1, 2003